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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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So, I dry off a bit and decide to take a stroll. I hit up the thermal baths. Man, if you haven’t been, you’re missing out. It’s like heaven on earth. I’m chillin’ in the warm water, and I start thinkin’ about life. Like, why do I even do this job? But then I remember the pastries, and I’m like, “Oh yeah, that’s why!”

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